Linia Took in a Child - Chapter 8: Ruin (3)

“Are you avoiding my eyes because you’re afraid your resolve will weaken?”

He chuckled softly, lying down beside her.

“Linia, won’t you at least look at me? Just one kiss—I promise I’ll only hold you tonight.”

His voice was gentle, his tone almost pleading. Linia hesitated for a moment before turning to meet his gaze. As her eyes locked onto his, she leaned in and pressed her lips lightly against his. Instantly, his arms enveloped her, pulling her close.

“I can’t wait for tomorrow to come,” Ruin sighed softly, his breath warm against her ear.

“I just want to hold you. It’s incredible how perfectly we fit together… Sometimes it feels like you were made just for me.”

“…I was made for you,” Linia murmured, her voice tender.

“Are you trying to tempt me now?”

“You were made for me too, weren’t you?”

Smiling gently, Linia looked up at him, her expression serene. Captivated by her beauty, he remained quiet for a moment before speaking in a soft, earnest voice.

“Linia, let’s buy new identities and settle somewhere. What do you think about living as a married couple?”

His tone was lower now, calm yet filled with sincerity. Linia gazed into his clear, devoted eyes for a moment before answering.

“I love the way we live now, just the two of us. Traveling is nice, but… I’d love to live with you under the same roof every day.”

He nodded, his heart swelling at her words. The simplicity and tranquility of their life together brought him immense happiness. Waking up and falling asleep by her side each day—this routine gave him a sense of peace like nothing else.

“Do you want to settle down?” she asked gently.

“Only if it’s what you want.”

“…I like it too, spending every day like this,” Linia said softly.

The quiet crackle of logs burning in the fireplace filled the room. In the cozy warmth that wrapped around them, the harsh chill of the outside world felt like a distant memory.

“I think I’d be happy,” she murmured.

Living as a married couple with him would undoubtedly bring her happiness. Resting in his broad embrace, Linia spoke with him, their conversation flowing effortlessly.

Like a pair who had already vowed to spend their lives together, their tender and intimate words continued through the night, filling the room with a sense of love and contentment.

* * *

On a day when the snow had stopped, the two of them went down to the village to buy supplies.

Hoo…

Although her breath formed small white clouds in the cold air, Linia actually felt a bit warm. Wearing two layers of padded clothing underneath her winter robe, which she had pulled up over her head, made it inevitable.

Even if she wanted to take something off, she couldn’t. Ruin wouldn’t have let her come outside otherwise. Ever since she caught a cold once, he had become overly meticulous about how warmly she dressed.

“I think we’ve bought most of what we need… Should we look around a bit more just to be sure?”

Since it wasn’t clear when the snow might start falling again, it was better to stock up in advance. With his arms full of supplies, Ruin turned to Linia, his gaze steady beneath the robe that obscured most of his face. His eyes, for now, were an ordinary shade of brown.

“I think we’re all set. Let’s head back—you must be tired from carrying all that.”

“It’s not heavy, don’t worry. You’ve been cooped up in the house for so long—you should take this chance to enjoy the fresh air and look around.”

Linia glanced at the pile of bags he was holding but eventually nodded, deciding to stroll a little longer. It had been so long since she’d been out that going straight back home felt like a waste. She suggested splitting the burden of the bags between them, but he immediately refused, his tone gentle yet firm.

“I could never let the Saintess carry anything.”

“Do you only treat me like a saintess when it’s convenient? Even though every night you do things that completely defy church doctrine…”

“And Linia breaks it with me. Besides, what we’re doing isn’t a sin—it’s just expressing our deep love.”

Linia thought his boldness was a bit too much at times. At the same time, memories of his many shameless acts came flooding back, making her ears burn with embarrassment.

She shook her head to dismiss the thoughts and turned her attention to the bustling street. Walking alongside him, she browsed the shops lining the road.

“Ah, wait a moment. I just remembered something I need to buy,” Ruin said suddenly, halting in his tracks. He turned to face her.

“Want to come with me?”

“No, I’ll just look around the nearby shops while you’re gone.”

“Alright, but don’t go too far. Stay close, okay?”

He repeated his warning twice, his tone resembling that of someone speaking to a child to ensure they understood. Given her track record of disappearing three times in the past, Linia nodded quietly, resigned.

As Ruin crossed to the other side of the street, Linia turned her gaze to the stores nearby. Snow remained piled up in various corners of the street, untouched and sparkling in the daylight.

She walked cautiously, her thick layers making her steps slower than usual. That’s when she spotted a small shop with its lights on. Slowly approaching, she looked through the glass window.

Inside, baby clothes and shoes were neatly displayed.

Linia’s eyes were drawn to a tiny pair of shoes. They seemed to be for a child just learning to walk—so small and delicate that they were irresistibly cute.

She couldn’t take her eyes off them.

For a fleeting moment, Linia wondered what it would be like if she and Ruin had a child. He had told her that he wanted to be her husband, that he wanted to spend the rest of his life by her side.

But if they were to marry, wouldn’t he eventually want children too?

“……”

Linia took a step back, as if shaking off lingering thoughts. Only then did she notice her reflection in the shop window, her expression unusually somber.

As she stood there, her gaze still fixed on the baby clothes displayed inside, a familiar voice called out to her from a distance.

“Linia?”

Snapping out of her thoughts, she turned around and saw Ruin walking toward her. Before he could reach the shop, she quickly closed the distance between them.

“Did you miss me that much? Why are you running over to me like that?” he teased, a playful smile tugging at his lips.

“Did it look like I did?”

“Yeah. If my hands weren’t full, I would’ve spread my arms and hugged you right here.”

Looking up at his bright smile, Linia let out a small laugh.

“Let me carry something, even if it’s light, Ruin,” she offered again.

But as usual, he simply smiled, making no move to hand over any of the bags. Instead, he leaned down and planted a quick kiss on her cheek.

“It’s cold. Let’s head back now.”

After they returned home, Ruin busied himself in the small kitchen, preparing dinner. Thanks to their successful shopping trip, that evening’s meal was more elaborate than usual. Linia tasted each of the five dishes he prepared, praising every single one.

Her enthusiastic response brought him a sense of satisfaction. Cooking had started as a necessity—there was no one else to do it—but he had since discovered an unexpected talent for it. With someone like Linia who enjoyed his cooking so much, he felt inspired to make his dishes even better.

As they ate, he observed which dish she reached for the most. He decided to refine that recipe tomorrow.

It wasn’t long before Ruin noticed something unusual about her. Though she smiled and talked with him as usual, there was a fleeting heaviness in her demeanor, like a shadow passing briefly over her. It wasn’t hard for him to notice she seemed quieter than normal.

“Linia, are you feeling unwell?” he asked, concern evident in his tone.

“Huh? Not at all. I’m perfectly fine.”

“You don’t feel like you’re coming down with something, do you?”

He couldn’t forget how she had once insisted she was fine despite showing signs of a cold, only to suffer through the night. Still suspicious, he reached out and placed a hand on her forehead. But there was no sign of a fever.

Linia smiled and reassured him that she was just a bit tired, prompting him to let out a small sigh of relief.

After dinner, Ruin insisted that she not help with cleaning up and encouraged her to head to the bedroom to rest instead.

“Time flew by,” Ruin muttered to himself later. Between tidying the kitchen and taking a bath, two hours had passed before he realized it. He quietly tiptoed into the bedroom, assuming she would already be asleep.

“…Were you waiting for me?”

Contrary to his expectations, Linia was sitting up in bed, her eyes warm as she looked at him.

“Yes. Come here,” she said, patting the spot beside her after setting a book down on the bedside table.

The sight of her, beautiful and inviting, brought an automatic smile to Ruin’s face. He climbed onto the bed and pulled her into his arms.

“You’re heavy, Ruin,” Linia murmured, gently patting his broad back. But instead of letting go, he only held her tighter, burying his nose against her slender shoulder to take in her scent.

“You’re like a puppy. Stop sniffing me,” she said with a small laugh, the tickle of his hair brushing her cheek and neck making her giggle softly.

His sharp nose began to travel downward, trailing along her collarbone. As he tried to nuzzle into the space between her breasts, Linia lowered her hands and cupped his face, stopping him.

“It’s time to sleep.”

Ruin reluctantly lifted his head, though the regret was plain in the downward tilt of his eyes. Even as he looked up, his gaze remained drawn to the pale expanse of her skin peeking through her slightly disheveled clothes.

The delicate curve of her chest, soft and inviting, made him want to bite down gently—just enough to leave a mark without causing her pain. Afterward, he wanted to soothe her with his tongue, to erase the sting he’d leave behind.

Not tonight…

He clicked his tongue in frustration. She was clearly tired, her eyes half-lidded as she gazed at him with a dreamy, drowsy expression. And yet, just lying beneath him, she was so utterly captivating it drove him mad.

“Can I at least rest my head on your chest while I sleep?” he asked.

“No, that’s embarrassing.”

“But you sleep in my arms every night,” he grumbled, clearly feeling the unfairness of it. Still, he obediently lay down beside her, stretching one arm out to pillow her head while his other arm wrapped securely around her waist, pulling her close.

“Then at least let me watch your sleeping face,” he said.

“Alright,” she answered with a soft, warm smile.

As he gazed at her, a peaceful silence settled over the room. But the longer he looked, the more his concern grew.

“Linia, are you really feeling okay?” he asked gently.

“Do I look unwell?”

“You seem a little low on energy.”

Though she was usually calm by nature, Linia had subtle tells that Ruin had learned to pick up on. They weren’t obvious, but if you paid attention, it wasn’t hard to notice when something was bothering her.

“Don’t hide anything from me. Tell me the truth,” he pressed.

His hand, which had been resting on her waist, moved to cradle her cheek. His large palm gently cupped her face, ensuring she couldn’t turn away from him.

“Did something happen in the village while I wasn’t with you?”

Her subdued mood had started after their trip to the village, and he couldn’t shake the thought that perhaps someone had approached her in his absence. Worry flickered in his crimson eyes.

“…I just thought it might be nice to have a child,” she admitted softly. “Maybe that’s why I’ve been feeling this way.”

Her answer took him by surprise, completely different from what he had expected. At the mention of children, Ruin slowly closed his eyes before opening them again, processing her words.

“You remember what we talked about before, about marriage,” she continued, her voice tinged with a faint wistfulness. “If I could have children, we could truly have a family…”

Her words trailed off as she gave him a weak smile. She felt guilty for making him worry but couldn’t help wondering what he truly thought about the idea. She waited nervously for his response.

“Do you remember what I told you back then?” Ruin asked after a moment, his hand brushing gently against her cheek.

“I meant it when I said that it doesn’t matter to me if you can’t have children.”

It was something he’d said long ago when he was still disguised as Russell. At the time, she might have thought it was a lie to comfort her, but his words had been completely sincere. In truth, back then, he had even felt relieved that she couldn’t have children.

“When I said I wanted to marry you, it was because I wanted to be with you, not because I wanted to start a family,” he whispered, his voice low and soothing. As he spoke, he brushed a stray lock of hair from her face, tucking it gently behind her ear.

“Just having you by my side is enough, Linia. That’s all I need, so don’t worry about anything else.”

“……”

“To be honest, I’m already so happy that it feels like I don’t deserve it. If I dared to wish for more, I’m sure I’d be punished for it,” he added with a soft laugh.

“And… someone like me as a father? That would just be unfair to the child.”

“Don’t say things like that,” Linia said firmly.

Reaching out, she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. Resting her forehead against his chest, she spoke in a voice tinged with gentle determination.

“Don’t speak poorly about yourself.”

Linia’s voice carried a hint of hurt, as though his words had stung her more deeply than he realized. Only now did Ruin truly understand the weight of what he’d said.

Looking at Linia, who clung to him with such tenderness, the self-loathing that had crept into his heart washed away completely, replaced by a warmth that spread through him.

“As I thought, there’s no one but you for me,” he murmured with a soft laugh, tightening his embrace around her delicate frame.