Saving You, Villain - Chapter 81

I placed the necklace on Camian’s desk. If it hadn’t been for what happened earlier today, I might have lain on his bed for a moment while he was away. But instead, like a bulldozer on a mission, I dropped the necklace and left quickly. Just seeing anything related to him brought back the vivid shame from this afternoon.

Not only that, but the memory of how close Camian had been with Lila lingered in my mind, too. It surprised me to see him act so freely, so comfortably with her, as though they had known each other for ages.

It felt like hot water had been poured over my heart. Only after seeing them together with my own eyes did I finally accept the truth: Camian no longer liked me. His heart now belonged to someone else. As this reality settled in, Camian suddenly felt distant, almost like a stranger. It was hard to believe that I used to tease him daily.

“It’s for the best. A good change,” I whispered to myself.

If things stayed like this, I thought, I could die tomorrow without regrets. I had done all I could, and the result was clear. Camian would be fine—sure, he might not be completely indifferent to my death, but Lila would be there to comfort him. Camian, who lived and breathed for love, wouldn’t make any extreme choices because of his new lover.

Yet despite telling myself it was for the best, a heat built up behind my eyes. I kept thinking, “It’s better this way, it’s a relief,” but my heart still hurt. Watching Camian and Lila talk so casually made me feel like crying. Still, I wanted Camian to be happy.

Two conflicting emotions swirled inside me, and I hated it. I hated this two-faced side of myself. If I couldn’t even like myself, how could Camian ever love me forever?

I felt like I was sinking into a bottomless swamp of despair. I didn’t sleep at all that night.

I ran my hand over my weary face. My reflection showed a dull and puffy face, the result of no sleep. I pulled up my hoodie and wrapped a scarf around my neck. The moment I stepped outside, the cold wind yanked at my hood, trying to pull it off.

Camian was already outside, waiting. When he saw me, his hand twitched slightly. But that was all. He didn’t touch me. I slowly blinked my heavy eyelids, weighed down with exhaustion.

“Yesterday, you…” he began.

Was I dreaming? Camian had spoken to me first. I rubbed my eyes with both hands and looked up at him, locking eyes with his red ones. In that instant, I was flooded with the image of him standing so close to Lila, her hand resting on his shoulder, their faces nearly touching. My heart ached.

“Didn’t you hurt your knees?” he asked.

I couldn’t bear to look him in the face. The memory of Lila’s hand gripping his shoulder, her face near his, wouldn’t leave my mind. I lowered my head.

“No.”

I wanted to run from his gaze. I forced myself to stand firm, my feet rooted to the ground. After a long, tense silence, Camian let out a sigh.

“I won’t ask you anything anymore, so lift your head.”

“…”

I kept my eyes down, and in front of me, I saw his back. Slowly, I moved toward him and climbed onto his back. We didn’t speak a word after that.

***

Why does realization always come a step too late? I slapped my forehead with a loud thwack.

“I forgot to mention the necklace.”

When Camian had spoken to me earlier, I should have asked if he’d seen the necklace on his desk. I needed to explain that it wasn’t from me—it was from Sherry. Ugh, what an idiot.

Should I bring it up when we head home later? But Camian’s mood had been terrible all day. Maybe he’d had a fight with Lila? His sour mood was so noticeable that even the other students at the academy were tiptoeing around him. The usual crowd that surrounded him had mysteriously vanished, and Camian’s cold expression remained unchanged.

“What if I talk to him and he just lashes out at me?”

Sighing, I knocked on the door of Luke’s office. No response.

“He must still be in class.”

I used the key Luke had given me and let myself in. As I sank into the worn leather couch, the cushion sagged under me.

“Luke already took care of the attendance sheets, and all the class materials are set up in the training hall…”

I had nothing to do. But sitting around would only bring back thoughts of Camian, and I couldn’t afford to let my mind go there again. I needed to move.

I decided to clean the office. I started wiping down the dusty window sills, sweeping the floor, and organizing the scattered papers and pens on the desk. As I worked, I warmed up, so I tied my hair back and hung my coat on the back of the couch.

Even after I had swept and wiped every corner of the office, Luke still hadn’t returned. I let out a heavy breath, glancing around the room for more tasks. My gaze landed on the bookshelf. The books were scattered randomly, with no sense of order or size.

Seeing this messy shelf after being so used to Camian’s organized one irritated me.

I began pulling the books off the shelves, sorting them by size and subject. There were all kinds—books on herbal medicine, magic theory, even an egg recipe guide.

“Wait, this one…”

I froze, holding a small, black leather-bound book in my hands. I had glimpsed this book once before.

“How to Kill Demons.”

As if hypnotized, I opened the book. I started reading from the first page, but soon grew bored as it delved into a long explanation of the origin of demons. Skipping ahead, I skimmed the bold section titles, flipping through the small, dense text. Suddenly, my hand stopped.

“How to Break a Contract with a Demon.”

Though the book was a sloppy mess, written backwards about methods for binding souls, an intriguing subtitle drew me in.

“If you’ve entered into a contract with a demon, remember: the master of that contract is the demon, not you. You’ve made a mistake even dumber than borrowing petty cash from a ruthless loan shark. Demons know no mercy, and they cunningly deceive you into handing over your soul. Your life is over the moment they succeed.

I pity you for not realizing that the afterlife is far longer and more distant than the reality you now cling to. You’ve been robbed of eternity by the demon.”

“No, don’t just scare me. Explain how to break the contract already,” I muttered, flipping through the pages half-heartedly.

There’s no point in feeling fear now. You have no right to break the contract with the demon. Only the demon can render it void. But as stated earlier, demons have no mercy. They’ll do whatever it takes to snatch your soul.

“What the hell? So there’s no solution at all? What a downer,” I grumbled.

But. There is not no way. The only option you have is death. If you take your own life before the life granted by God expires, the contract will be nullified. The foolish human who signed the contract is advised to commit suicide immediately upon reading this book. The demon would never have explained this single way out to you. Do not trust demons.

A chill ran down my spine, from my arms to the nape of my neck. Kill myself immediately? What kind of book is this? As I thought, this book was nonsense. Disgusted, I shut the book with a loud snap! and slid it back onto the shelf.

“I’m never reading that again.”

With that resolution, I began tidying up the rest of the books. As I dusted off the layers of powdery dust from the covers, I heard a click. The door opened.

Luke entered, shirtless, gripping a wooden training sword in one hand. He glanced around the room before apologizing.

“Were you cleaning?”

“Yes. There wasn’t much else to do. But have you been walking around like that all this time?”

“I got a little warm while training.”

“People won’t take kindly to you walking around like that in winter.”

“Yes, I noticed… I’ve been hearing screams from the female students as I pass by.”

For a moment, I hesitated, wondering if those screams might actually be cheers.

“Even if it’s a hassle, you should put on a shirt.”

“You’re right.”

Luke placed the wooden sword against the wall and approached me.

“Do you need something?” I asked.

“You tied your hair up today.”

“Well, I got a little warm while cleaning, too.”

Luke’s gaze lingered persistently around my neck. Thinking there might be something on it, I rubbed my neck with my palm. Luke frowned slightly.

“…A mark.”

His warm hand brushed against my neck. I flinched, my shoulders trembling, but Luke, uncharacteristically, paid no mind and gently caressed the spot on my neck.